Alden said:
Rule 6. There is no Rule 6.
A Monty Python fan if ever I saw one, but rule #4 should have been "I don't want to catch anybody not drinking." And now for something completely different...
The Meadmakers Song (adapted for GotMeads highest posting members with apologies to Monty Python and Norskersword who got bumped by the ever missing ThirstyViking... artistic license dude!

)
Pewter in a rant is a real piss-ant who is very rarely stable.
Brewbear, Brewbear is a boozy beggar who can think you under the table.
Dmntd claims to out-consume even Oskaar when he's tricksy.
And Jmattioli is a meady swine who is just as sloshed as Vicky.
There's nothing McFeely couldn't teach 'ya 'bout the raising of the wrist.
Byathread, himself, is permanently pissed.
David Baldwin still, of his own free will, after half a pint of Sack is particularly ill.
Wrathwilde, they say, can stick it away, half a crate of Acerglyn every day!
Mynx and Jab are buggers for the bottle,
and Miriam is fond of sheychar dvash.
Lostnbronx is a drunken Ox:
"I drink, therefore I'm sauced."
Yes, ThirstyViking himself is particularly missed;
JoeM's a lovely little thinker, but a bugger when he's pissed.
Right, now let's get some Sheilas.
Wrathwilde